38 Comments
User's avatar
The Truth Fairy's avatar

What a beautiful tapestry and Work of art this article is. I could not agree more. I don’t listen to the capitalistic robotic Looney Tunes people who just spurt whatever rubbish they have been socially conditioned to believe. It’s boring, it’s vapid, and it lacks depth .

My my only wish is that I stopped listening to them sooner than I had!

PS. You look absolutely gorgeous in that photo completely luscious. ❤️❤️☺️☺️☺️☺️☺️

Expand full comment
Nadia Meli's avatar

Thank you for reading and relating to it and letting me know how it made you feel 🙏🏼

Expand full comment
Pia Whitmartlet's avatar

The only thing I would say is the false security of being employed. If you are employed you are the last to know if things are going awry. If it is your business you are in control and can see issues as they arise... and you are the last person to be fired.

Expand full comment
Nadia Meli's avatar

Indeed, but this piece wasn't about security at all. None of us are safe within capitalism, wether you're the employer or employee. Security within capitalism is another capitalist lie.

Expand full comment
Pia Whitmartlet's avatar

Ultimately though we have eat and survive. So unless you have a farm and a house to start with - inherited wealth - how does humankind survive in society. Mafia style? you look after your own? Anarchy? just steal what you want? Socialism? state steals it for you? Theocracy? -religion steals it from you on pain of death for non compliance? Communism? - you own nothing including your own thoughts and autonomy? So how do you achieve what you want without being either employed or self employed (or benefiting from someone else's sweat and stress)? You have a huge choice- humankind operates and has operated under many systems and if you take past one into account you can add those, or like Thomas More did back in the day when he wrote Utopia you can make your own one up. So if not capitalism, in what framework/social system does your philosophy on life fit? If not capitalism then what are you advocating? Don't get me wrong, I am the first person to say that it is life limiting to define yourself by what you do, rather than who you are but having lived in North Korea (communism) and worked in Rwanda/Burundi during the genocide (anarchism) capitalist democracy which rewards hard work with the secondary benefit of the common good seems the best to me. Without capitalism would I even be able to ask you this question without a computer in front of me?

Expand full comment
Nadia Meli's avatar

Those are all great questions and I invite you to read other pieces of mine that seek to answer the exact things you address here. Again, this piece was not in the slightest about security or even the dismantling of capitalism - but the definition and understanding of what makes a good life. While everything is connected, this piece did not seek to answer the questions you are raising. But I do this a lot in other letters of mine.

Expand full comment
Gee's avatar

No, step up..

Expand full comment
Israa Nasir's avatar

Love the analogy of life as a garden not a ladder!

Expand full comment
Nadia Meli's avatar

Thank you for being here Israa!

Expand full comment
Sarvam's avatar

Ahahaha, this felt such a gentle gut-punch :) I’ve spent so long chasing “up” that I forgot life can grow sideways, quietly, beautifully.

Expand full comment
Nadia Meli's avatar

Growing sideways all day every day! :) I hear you, I often forget it too! And it helps looking at my life like a landscape, not like a mountain or a tower! Thank you for being here in this space with me!

Expand full comment
Laura Bee Rita Wilson's avatar

“Your life is not linear nor vertical. Your life is a breathing landscape. Reaching out wildly into whatever direction and space offers the conditions for it to grow, but always following a cycle.”

SIGH.

Thank you, Nadia. I really really needed this today, this week and this month. The fallow seasons are so hard to endure surrounded by those who call it failure and unproductivity, like a character defect. (My family). My bones know the truth that you’ve written so beautifully, like a poem, but my mind frequently forgets and spirals, the ego obsessing over how much “further ahead” or “more established I should be” at my age (just shy of 30).

Anyway, I’ll be returning to this piece. I think I almost need to print it out and pin it to my wall, read daily, until I remember this truth daily. Thank you for writing. 🌷

Expand full comment
Nadia Meli's avatar

Laura, I hear you. You are so brave for listening to your bones. Always listen to your bones. They're wiser than your family and any other voices outside. You are building a gorgeous landscape, it just so happens that your soil needs rest right now. ❤️

Expand full comment
Laura Bee Rita Wilson's avatar

Thank you for this reassurance Nadia, it means a lot. 🥹 Thank you for bravely walking your path and for helping to light the way for the other seekers and renegades ♥️

Expand full comment
Barbs Honeycutt's avatar

I am such a fan of how you word things :)

Expand full comment
Nadia Meli's avatar

You're so kind to me. Thank you for your continuous support Barbs! ❤️

Expand full comment
quyen's avatar

As a child of Asian immigrants, this really resonated with me. My mom has always been a go-getter her entire adult life, working so hard to provide a stable life for her children. Unfortunately, her rush for success got instilled into me at a really young age, and I was the eldest daughter. I too was watching and listening and reading “success stories” about “successful people.” People who made a lot of money and used their influence to help others also achieve their dreams through “self-help.” At first, I was inspired to be that way too. But the older I get, the more these messages of “pulling yourself together” and “think like a wealthy/successful person” and “just go after it no matter the cost!” resonated less with me. These messages did not create room for rest, healing, and reflection. But your messages and your pieces do, and I’m so grateful I stumbled upon your work through Substack. It’s been life-changing. Thank you ❤️

Expand full comment
Nadia Meli's avatar

I feel you Quyen!!! I think a lot of us relate to what you just described. You should be so proud of yourself for this paradigm shift!!!

Expand full comment
Ronja's avatar

"Believing that a life is great because it follows a capitalist script of success and everyone who doesn't is mediocre, shows a huge lack of wisdom or imagination." SO TRUE 🦋

Expand full comment
Nadia Meli's avatar

Thank you for reading Ronja and leaving some love in the comments!

Expand full comment
Friday's avatar

You speak with so much strong-affirming love. Thank you for this reminder.

Expand full comment
Nadia Meli's avatar

Thank you for being here! I am glad the reminder found you!

Expand full comment
Sara Noble's avatar

Going to come back to this again and again. These words soothed. Thank you!

Expand full comment
Nadia Meli's avatar

I am so glad they did Sarah!

Expand full comment
Natalie's avatar

As always, the tonic I needed. I struggle with my deep knowing that life is - as you beautifully put it - a garden, a landscape, NOT a ladder. But man it’s hard out here to avoid everyone half way up their ladders of life looking down on you, eh? Xx

Expand full comment
Nadia Meli's avatar

Oh I know!!! I hear you. It's very hard. But we can try :)

Expand full comment
Bryony Hutt's avatar

A beautiful reminder of something I think I always knew in my heart, though it took me til recent years to embrace this truth.

My dad used to tease me that my career was less of a ladder and more of continual side step. Looking back I'm proud that even before I had the political and spiritual understanding, I was resisting in my own way. I'm doing so more consciously now, and whilst my health forced my hand to some extent, I'm grateful that it did.

I still find myself consumed by shame at points. No wonder with the world continuing to tell us that we are wrong, that we should be seeking great heights of 'success'. Thank you for the encouragement to keep finding the beauty in all the messy sideways and backwards paths of life 💛

Expand full comment
Nadia Meli's avatar

You are so so brave and big to go your own path Bryony! You can be so proud of yourself!

Expand full comment
Sanja Tomić's avatar

Wonderful and liberating ✨ Thank you

Expand full comment
Nadia Meli's avatar

Thank you for reading ❤️

Expand full comment
Dr. Gabriel Barsawme, LSW's avatar

This is a beautiful and heartfelt piece. Love it.

Expand full comment
Nadia Meli's avatar

Thank you so much for being here!

Expand full comment
seher's avatar

beautiful beautiful beautiful

Expand full comment
Nadia Meli's avatar

Thank you so much darling ❤️

Expand full comment